How to make an Awesome Cheese and Garlic Dip
Ingredients (enough for 6 fat bastards....get more crisps if necessary)
500ml Mayonnaise
500g Cheese (medium to mild not strong and crumbly)
9 Garlic cloves (more if you really hate your neighbours)
Salt and pepper to taste
500g Cheese (medium to mild not strong and crumbly)
9 Garlic cloves (more if you really hate your neighbours)
Salt and pepper to taste
Instructions
Firstly apply lashings of nail polish, Jarvo prefers a vivid pink as shown. Get everything together. Crush and mince the garlic then mix with the Mayonnaise. Season with salt and pepper but don't kick the arse out of it, you can always add more later.
Grate the cheese, stuffing as much in your mouth as you can without getting caught, then grate some more and lob it in with the other stuff. Check your nails are still ok and then check the seasoning. When happy, spend a few unnecessary minutes checking the seasoning a few more times whilst licking fingers then cover with cling film or Saran Wrap and plonk in the fridge until needed, ideally overnight.
The next day remove from fridge a while before eating and serve with crisps (chips), bread, Ritz crackers or for the heathens amongst you...celery. Remember to remove both the cling film and nail polish.